I’m sitting in a kitchen in a tiny old apartment in Sandanski, Bulgaria. It’s about 1:32 pm here, sunny and warm outside. My cousin-in-law is sitting on the bed next to me (beds in kitchens are occasionally a thing here, really cool), and we’re listening to retro 80’s music on my phone while working on our computers. I haven’t felt this relaxed in a long, long time. We came here a week ago, just me and my two girls. A special 6-week vacation to stay with my husband’s family (he is back at home, holding down the fort like a champion, making us all miss him awfully). It is also a chance for me to disconnect from all the maddening stress that had been stalking me for many months at home. The combination of being sick and having sick babies for weeks on end, since February, with barely a breather between each new illness, and my constant companion of allergies so fierce they make my brain feel like cooked squash, was wearing me …
I’ve spent too much of my thirties and twenties worried about what others think of my body. Is it thin enough? Is it too thin? Why do I have cellulite even when I’m almost fifteen pounds underweight?…ENOUGH! If you saw a picture of me, you’d likely want to punch me in the face! I’m lovely but more importantly, I’m healthy….”
At the time, I thought all of these situations meant that I was failing and falling and making the wrong decisions but now I see all of these “roads not taken” as the ones that led me here to a life that I am totally in love with (and falling more in love with everyday). I had to feel what DIDN’T work for me to find out what makes me soar.
We find, we read, we get pumped/stoked/inspired/SO into it, and we share. It’s the Monday Menagerie.