I’m sitting here holding on to my enormous belly, thinking a stream of words running rapidly through my mind… I am 38 1/2 weeks pregnant, only 11 days until due date, I need to be ready, I am ready, I’m not ready, I’m so excited and so tired and everything hurts and I can’t bend over without grunting and squatting…
Tuesday, July 11, 6:29am, Haskovo, Bulgaria.
Sounds and sights from the balcony…A row of black socks on a clothes line,
One red wall amongst brown,
The sound of pigeon feathers, flapping wings,
A sheet with yellow and white stripes stretched out to dry….
No one ever said it would be easy. But good grief I didn’t think it’d be so hard.
Just life. The grown-up part of it. Now. Being post-30, with children, attempting to continue to make your own path.
Thoughts and words for a new year
“…ultimately it’s about how you define success or failure. For me, success is found in the process; success is found in the satisfaction of completing a task or reaching a goal, no matter how tiny….”
We say we want to know why, but do we ask the right questions?
“Nine years and eleven months ago I was married, trying in vain to conceive, living in Los Angeles, both of my parents and my grandmothers were still alive and I had never flown over seas before even though I’d been dreaming about it since as early as I can remember…”
.. isn’t it funny that when you aren’t looking your life becomes exactly what you wanted it to be, by the fate of your very actions…
“What I realized… was that I didn’t pursue my dreams because I didn’t know what the heck those dreams were. Instead, I was on a journey to DISCOVER my dreams through trial and error…”
“…Make the drive
across the bay
and through the woods
to your small house…”
I am writing this after a walk and an online yoga session with my teacher, Annie Carpenter. My mind is still and my body at rest. The constant barrage of thoughts and worries have subsided and settled like little flakes at the bottom of a snow globe. On January 1, I was asked to think of one word to focus on for 2016. Of course, my immediate thought was “what’s a word that would cause some sort of improvement?” There must be a word to make me better, right? That’s what New Years Resolutions are all about! But, the inner experiences I have been through this month have urged me to see this concept of intention and focus through a different spiritual lense. I continue to wrestle with perfectionism. God bless. Sometimes I think this is my most important life lesson! This week it was brought to light in a variety of ways…when I put sink dish soap in the dishwasher and bubbles exploded everywhere, when I lost out on a job, and when a …